The Books of the States: Now It Gets Personal

Taking up my Washington list from yesterday as a gauntlet I hadn't even realized I had thrown, State by State editor Matt Weiland sent me this note, putting my adopted home against the list he submitted a few weeks back for Minnesota:

Good list, pal. I can't resist going head-to-head... All winners selected with honor and without bias, selections based on Literary Value in general and Personal Significance in my life:

Carver WHERE I’M CALLING FROM v Lewis MAIN STREET: draw
Wolff THIS BOY’S LIFE v Fitzgerald GREAT GATSBY: Minnesota
McCarthy MEMOIRS OF A CATHOLIC GIRLHOOD v Rolvaag GIANTS IN THE EARTH: Washington
Burns BLACK HOLE v Powers COLLECTED STORIES: Washington
Larson FAR SIDE v Schulz PEANUTS: Minnesota
Herbert DUNE v Berryman DREAM SONGS: draw
Stephenson CRYPTONOMICON v Pirsig ZEN…: Washington
Hugo MAKING CERTAIN v Keillor WE ARE STILL MARRIED: Minnesota
Alexie ABSOLUTELY TRUE… v O’Brien THE THINGS…: Minnesota
Rule STRANGER v Dylan CHRONICLES: Minnesota
Bouton BALL FOUR v [no entry]: Washington

Final score: Washington 4, Minnesota 5

Victory! Not that I'm boasting...

Ah, even with that gimme at the end, what I thought was a solid Washington lineup went down hard. And the worst of it is I can't even complain about his judgments. Oh, you might get the refs to go the other way on Carver v. Lewis or Hugo v. Keillor, but that's nitpicking. My best chance would be an appeal to the board of governors arguing that Gatsby, the Great Long Island Novel, doesn't belong in Minnesota at all, which would free up one of my strongest grapplers, Toby Wolff, to fight a lesser foe.

Matt graciously suggested I try putting my list in chronological order, as his was, to see if I got better matchups, but all I'll say is, well, that made things worse (plus I got a headache trying to compare Ball Four to Giants in the Earth...). The end result is: I'm looking for somebody else to pick on, somebody my own size. Missouri, with its 11 votes, same as Washington? No way I'm taking on Mark Twain, The Wasteland, and The Corrections. Maybe Indiana... --Tom